My expert analysis on GW kids

GW likes to portray the student body as good little kids who split their time between interning at the White House and helping the elderly. I should know, I give tours so I’m complicit in upholding this image. But that is far from true. After spending 5 semesters here I feel like this is a more accurate picture of GW kids:

To start with we’ll go for the easy one-

JAPs: I was unaware of how Jewish GW was before I came here. I had some idea that there was a large Jewish contingent but I didn’t really know what that would mean. I grew up in the suburbs of Philadelphia, but far enough away that we didn’t have Jews. Or diversity. We had about eight black kids and twelve Asians in my high school (and I went to a public school). It wasn’t until senior year that I learned saying “Happy Yom Kippur” was not okay. So I didn’t know what a JAP was when I left for school. But I learned quickly. And I am not saying that all the Jewish girls at GW are awful. Obviously that’s ridiculous. It’s not anywhere near a majority. But it’s enough that it’s noticeable. Anyway, these are the girls that think leggings are pants and their Blackberry is an extension of their hand. Frequent conversations include hitting up clubs on the weekends and daddy on the weekdays when money is running low. The amount of money they drop on things is ridiculous. They also smoke copious cigarettes. Often in front of my building. Gross. I really don’t need to expound upon this anymore. I think we all know what these girls are like.

Type-A Future Presidents: These kids closely resemble what GW wants its students to be, except they go above and beyond all that. They have internships freshman year and plan out their lives right up until they hit 25 and are eligible to run for Congress. They are on the e-boards of five different student orgs and have business cards. They too have Blackberries glued to their hands and are constantly checking their e-mail. They are very important people.

“I wish I were at Georgetown”: GW is not Georgetown and while most kids here are cool with that, there are a few who are not. And they are bitter. These are the kids who started selling “Fuck Georgetown” t-shirts around campus. However, some of them transfer and others would sell a kidney for a chance to. I met kids at orientation who in our first conversation told me they had wanted to go to Georgetown but didn’t get in. Awkward.

Frat Boys: The Jappy girls would not be complete without some tool-bag guys hanging around. Obviously frat boys are far from exclusive to GW, but GW has its own special brand of douche. 90% of their clothing is emblazoned with their letters.* They sit through class watching Entourage on their fancy MacBooks and texting on their iPhones. Much to cool to put their phone on silent, we all get to hear that lovely vibrating noise when they get texts. Monday mornings are spent regaling the weekend before. You found a girl drunk enough to hook up with you. congratulations.

Hipsters: It's funny seeing these kids juxtaposed with the JAPs and the frat boys. Because they are different. They wear cheap clothes because it's ironic and talk about the cool obscure bands you don't know about because you're just not quite that hip. They hide that they're from south Jersey and grew up with the girls who turned into GW's JAPs. They smoke lots too. But sometimes they smoke weed. gasp

There are lots of other types of people at GW, even shockingly enough, some down to earth normal ones. But I think this covers it as far as those stereotypes that epitomize GW go. Most kids are pretty cool. But some are completely ridiculous. Which is why I will have plenty of fodder for this blog.

* I have to admit, I liked the frat shirts that had something to effect of “We put a man on the moon. We put a man in the oval office. We put a man in Jessica Simpson.” Tacky but clever. I like it.